Dear Mummy and Daddy,
You are both so silly. How could you possibly have Imagined that I would be more interested in all these lovely baby toys that I got for Xmas? My baby phone? rubbish. My teething keys? Boring. No Mummy, what I am actually interested in is real stuff (like your real phone – I love to dribble all over and chew that.) and crumbs. Crumbs are good, I can spot one a mile away, and I make it my mission to get to it. I don’t mind that its right across the room, as I can commando crawl there now – it might take me a while but I can (and will) get to it. Stop watching me so closely, because you keep taking the fun things away right before I get to them. That is really naughty Mummy.
Mummy and Daddy, I don’t ask for much. I look at you trying really hard to interest me (yet again) in the ‘my first doll’ that you so lovingly picked out for me, and were so excited to give me thinking that I’d love it. I feel a bit bad so I do try to give it a bit of interest. But when you give me the choice, I will always choose the thing I’m not allowed. Like amelias tiny play mobil pieces, or puzzle pieces, or barbie dolls with long hair.) You see, you can’t fool me into thinking that these baby toys are really fun. They’re not as fun as these other things and we all know it.
So instead of continuing to give me these toys, I have a suggestion. I am happy to swap all of my toys with Amelia’s big girl toys. I promise that I’m old enough to use them, and they taste so much better than my own. And Amelia so obviously likes playing with my toys (especially my singing teapot and cups) so it is the perfect swap. Please mummy?