One week today I go back to work. I’ve had 11 months off, and as its so close I thought I would write a little about it.
My job was as a social worker with older people. It’s a great job in so many ways. I always wanted to work with older people, and before doing it I would have described it as my dream job. However, working full time with a 2 year old, a house to run and everything else is so stressful – I really struggled. My job was stressful too – so many different challenges and no day was ever like another. I was good at it – I had really good comments from some people I worked with and families, and I’m a bit of a perfectionist at work – I used to work in the evening to finish stuff off when I needed to, and when things worked well it was brilliant. However, working within ever tightening budgets, the never ending paperwork and the cases where there was no good answer and whatever you did was making the best of a bad situation were always so hard. I had lots of sleepless nights worrying and hoping that I’d done the best I could do.
Anyway, I’ve had 11 months off and it’s been amazing. Just not feeling completely stressed out and exhausted, not having a complete tip of a house and beans on toast for tea 4 nights a week, and having quality time with my 2 girls has been absolutely brilliant. I’ve loved it all – it’s not always been easy, but it has always been worth it. And having our family become a family of 4 – having Rosie has been amazing. She’s a wonderful baby, she makes me smile and makes my heart melt so much. I couldn’t ask for more, and I feel so lucky that I’ve been able to have this time off with my baby.
As I return to work, I’ve been thinking a lot about it. I’ve got my head around going back now, and in many ways I’m looking forward to it. It helps that I’m returning part time (2.5 days) so I think this should be a much better balance and ill still have lots of time with my girls. Amelia is really looking forward to having time with her childminder again as she has a good relationship with her.
And my job is different when I go back. I applied for and got a different role – same team, just slightly different. I’m going to be focussing on people with dementia, and also taking on supervision and some other bits. I hope it won’t be too much in part time hours, will have to wait and see how it goes. But I am looking forward to being able to do some intensive support for people, to get to know them well and make a difference – that’s why I do what I do, that’s the part of my job that I love. When someone trusts me and knows that ill always be honest, listen to them and try my very best for them, that makes me feel like I’m doing something good.
I will keep posted on how it goes – the only thing I’m worried about is how Rosie will cope on Mondays – this is the day that she will be in childcare from 8.15 to 5.45 so it’s a really long day for her. This is my big worry, but there’s nothing I can do about it, so just have to work with it for now and see how she is.